I'm not aiming this at anyone in particular... but I have to say something and it might offend some people. For this, I AM sorry... but it has to be said and MAYBE it will make some sense when you look at it from this angle.
I understand that people argue. I understand that people fight. A little turbulence is normal... however, when a MAN (or WOMAN) abuses you (via pushing without marks or hitting with marks) it's NOT RIGHT. There's no OTHER way around it. Yeah, you MAY love them or you MAY THINK you love them... but why in the hell are they hurting you then and why do you love being treated like that! (Trust me... get out and you'll find out what LOVE really is... even if it's just finding out how to love YOURSELF!) Now, when you RECOGNIZE that it's wrong and you are willing to leave... you leave for awhile. Fine, you know I can understand ONCE or TWICE... but every damn time and it's find for awhile then he does it again... HE'S going to keep doing it... and you're just ENABLING him to (because you love him). Once you get brave and you get out... you should probably stay out if he/she does it again! But whatever.
Now, when he leaves marks on you or just pushes you around... and you FILE A RESTRAINING ORDER. Fine... I can see why you want that restraining order. But when you file it and within the scope of that order you decide to FUCK the order, we'll get back together... DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO GET THEM IN SOME PLACES WHEN YOU HAVE BULLSHIT ORDERS EVERY DAY! SOME PEOPLE NEED THEM AND THEY ARE SO BACKED UP AND HARD TO GET BECAUSE THE COURTS ARE CLOGGED WITH YOUR BULLSHIT ORDER THEN THINK ABOUT THAT THE NEXT TIME THAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU REALLY WANT ONE! Again, maybe I can forgive you once... BUT when you do this over and over it gets hard for me to read, it gets hard for me to support any decision you make, it makes it hard for me to believe you are HALF the parent you claim to be, it makes it hard for me to TRY to give you advice... because even those of us who hear he's abusing me (yeah, we may not know half the story... but we know enough to give you the advice) know what's best... ESPECIALLY those who have been there! You need to take a step back... and stop abusing the system that is there to protect the people who need it! Just stop, just overcome the fear, learn to love yourself, and THEN you'll see what life really is. Even if it is harder, because you are raising kids on your own!